Happy birthday to my best friend.

Happy birthday to my best friend.

TODAY, March 1st marks the unofficial birthday of Ava, my best friend.

Ava, being the special little cherub she is, graced us on February 29th 2012, meaning she’s a leap year baby! Last year was her first official birthday, but when greeted ‘Happy first birthday’ she was furious…

“I’m not one, I’m four!” were the sentiments yelled on that day.


Today, Ava is at school, where she gets to sit on the ‘birthday chair’… Sounds kinda funky, where can I get one? And after school, we’ll party until late… like… 7ish?

The official point of this post is to celebrate the special beast that is my niece on her special day, and celebrate why she is legit the best friend you could possibly have.

Why is she the bestest friend one could possibly have?

  • She is one of the only people I know who actually acts their age
  • She comes out with the funniest things ever
  • She’s always a ray of sunshine super early in the morning – Surround yourself with positivity people!
  • You get to see the world through her eyes, and it’s really special
  • She’s got a great appetite… Sometimes people my age don’t want dessert, but I certainly do.
  • She makes really cool things, for example, this weekend just gone, she painted me a canvas with a giraffe on it, and it’s the best thing since sliced bread, and I really enjoy sliced bread, so that’s a bold statement.
  • She’s really clever, and helping her on her learning journey through life is truly amazing! Seeing her get smarter every day is brilliant!
  • She’s got a heart of gold – She loves everyone, and everything!
  • She’s creative!
  • She thinks I’m really cool.

These are just some of the things that make her the bestest friend possible. I bet you, that if you put these qualities against those of your best friend, your friend will be the inferior one in this equation.

I hope Ava reads this in a few short years and realises just how cool, special and loved she is!





Dear Ava,

I’m sure mummy or daddy are reading this to you, or if it’s me, hello,

I hope you have the best birthday ever, and enjoy your sweets, cake, and presents!
I’m really proud of you!


Top Gear… The live blog

Top Gear… The live blog

For months now, we have been ‘teased’ with snaps of Chris Evans and Matt LeBlanc filming for the new episode of ‘Top Gear’, but will it match up to the goodness that we BBC 2 viewers are used to?
I highly doubt it.

I’ll give you a little bit of history about the upcoming series…

One stunt, filmed by the Cenotaph immediately caused fury and outrage, and rightly so, however, I felt this was done in order to create controversy, generate a buzz and get people talking about a show that was once great and began to dwindle in its last series, with scenes that have been staged becoming more obvious, and  obviously, Jeremy Clarkson throwing a wobbler because he didn’t get his hungry time (We get it, you’re not you when you’re hungry)

I don’t know if it’s fair for me to be writing this because of my pure hatred for Chris Evans will obviously make it a very biased blog, but blogs are opinion based, right?


Chris has used his best radio voice to introduce the show, I felt like I was listening to a Money Supermarket ad or something…

20.20 (hey, I got a little busy, don’t kill me)

Matt LeBlanc sounds so monotone like he’s bored of this shit already – Don’t blame you fam.


Matt just gave his first car review… Describing the fabric of the seats as ‘disgusting’ #missyoujeremy


Wtf is Matt wearing and why?!



I’m hungry, and already bored of this show.

Matt isn’t a presenter, he’s an actor and looks too stiff when reading his autocue, Jesse whateverbergface is IRRITATING, Gordon Ramsay loves himself too much and I can’t take this.




I’m back, my mum had beef, so I had beef with her too – it’s the only thing to do.

The TV is back on and I haven’t missed much. (Can someone please tell me if Matt has said ‘How you doin’?’)


20.52 – this man looks like he’s about to drop dead


Mum’s just gone up to bed, she can’t be bothered with this rubbish either. I feel you wendy, I feel you.


I wish this was presented by Jack Whitehall, he’s actually funny and would be brilliant at this.


I made a listicle of songs that summarise Top Gear…


It’s Easter sunday, but I can still complain.

It’s Easter sunday, but I can still complain.

It’s raining, it’s cold and it’s grey outside… If my life was a movie or a novel the pathetic fallacy is setting me up for a tragedy or a horror movie… I can’t really say at the moment, but today is okay thus far.

Today it is essential that I write the main body of my essay.

I have not been purposefully putting it off, it’s just that everytime I even think of doing it, let alone sitting down and actually doing it, I begin to get the most excruciating pain in the left side of my head, it honestly feels like someone’s inside my head with a poker poking my brain and pushing my eye.

I honestly think writing the essay would be more fun than the pain I get when I attempt to write it.

It’s crazy…

Anyhow… I was planning on going to the gym and being social this evening by seeing my friends, but due to the poor weather and impending headache I doubt the possibility of either of those things.


I know it’s Easter Sunday, but I must have a moan put it out there, I really really hate when people slurp, scrape their plates, lick their fingers and their cutlery at the table.

It’s vile, it’s impolite, and plain disgusting.

Like, are you some kind of animal?

Have you no manners?

Do your parents condone that kind of behaviour?

I feel it’s mandatory for table manners to be taught to people before they’re allowed to dine in public or the presence of other humans.